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I have two sons with developmental disabilities. My worst fear is that they will live thier lives in isolation. The simple answer to why I want them to have realtionships is connection. Loneliness is pervasive and debilitating and far too few people with disabilities have authentic friendships with people in the “typical community”. Friendships form the basis for authentic citzenship, which is the act of community participation. PLAN Networks create the opportunity for the person at the centre to participate in loving, freely given, reciprocal relationships where the supporting members come to know the person at the focus of the network as more than “disabled”. They come to see the gifts and capacities of an individual who has been labeled disabled. Individuals with developmental disabilities often miss out on creating more sustainable, meaningful friendships for a variety of reasons. These can include lack of language, lack of understanding social cues, inability to initiate any obvious social interactions, lack of confidence, and lack of understanding on the part of their peers as to the capacity of these individuals to be friends. The “separateness” that begins in childhood often leads into a lifetime of loneliness. Networks can create the structure needed to help move beyond some of these roadblocks. Children nad adults with special needs may find fewer opportunities for communication and to start or build friendships with their peers, just because they have so much intervention and support built into their schedules. It may be that every moment of an individulas life is filled with academic coaching, progams or enrichment activities so that they do not spend time with others in a more natural way. For me the most importnat factor to creating conncetion for my sons, is intetion. Be intentional, be purposful, friendships take work.
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